Dreamworlds 3 &Guyland

I just finished watching Dreamworlds 3, a film that takes a look at the misogyny and violence of music videos. It ties so perfectly with Guyland because it shows a lot of the members of Guyland in their natural habitat-abusing women out of a sense of entitlement. It really affected me because I had no idea the amount of sex that goes into the videos that I watch. It was also interesting because the need to display sex was not just from random groupies/aspiring models and actresses who would sacrifice their self respect to get some screen time. This overt sexual behavior was from the likes of Beyonce, Madonna, Jessica Simpson, and Mandy Moore, and there was no way around recognizing the amount of use their bodies get to stay relevant. I had always thought of Beyonce as a strong, independent woman who had the highest self esteem. I would never even think to put her in the same category as these self-proclaimed “video ho’s,” but they can be compared. They are both selling the same thing, which is a fantasy. It is not to say that I believe Beyonce is insecure, because I don’t, I just can’t deny that there is a connection between her behavior in her videos and that of these random girls in the other videos. The intent is to be sexy and it is often times used as compensation for a lack of creativity. Women have become the tool to sell all types of items, most of all the male fantasy.

The video got me thinking more about the responsibility that women have in the formation of guyland and to the hope that it will be absolved someday. While I was watching the movie, I was thinking about the girl in chapter five of Guyland who had said that she was trying to be seen as equal in the eyes of the guys she knew, so she drank them under the table and slept with a stranger. I can bet that if someone asked a lot of the girls in these videos if they believed they were being disrespected, they would say no. They would probably make up some answer about the fact that they have complete control over their bodies and are independent thinkers. It is hard to decide whether or not that is true, but I’m just wondering why a woman once again feels the need to use her body to assert her equality with men. To the guy, the women are still objects and they are not viewed as being equal or respectable. They are just a reminder that men still have power over women. In order to help put a stop to guyland, women have got to stop being playthings and disguising it as “asserting equality.” We have got to start recognizing that using sexuality to be validated is not a healthy practice. Allowing men to pour liquor on our heads and throw meat at our naked bodies for sport is not a way to prove that we are their equals. If anything, it further proves in their minds that we are things that can be raped and beaten.

It is very difficult to regulate sex, however. Beyonce’s video for “Single Ladies” is quite different than Nelly’s video for “Tip Drill,” where women allow mostly their butt’s to be focused on while they wear thong underwear. In Beyonce’s video, she is wearing a leotard and dancing sexual at times, but she is not allowing men to disrespect her by swiping their credit cards between her butt cheeks. Oftentimes in videos by female artists, they are seen being sexual by themselves as opposed to dancing seductively on a man and letting him put his hands all over her. It is the same question that gets posed with porn stars. Obviously, they are watched by millions of men and a lot of them may have the same motives for their decisions-to assert their equality in a man’s world-but should they stop their jobs as well? I don’t have an answer. I don’t know why porn stars should be able to continue doing what they do, but “video ho’s” should stop. Maybe it is because a lot of female porn stars have creative freedom over their careers, but then I think that a lot of the porn companies that these women work for are ran by men. So, do they have creative freedom, or are they just sexual playthings like the women in the videos are? I really can’t figure it out. What’s more, if I were to let the thought of who runs the company be my deciding factor, then it would pose an even bigger issue because record companies where Beyonce and Madonna work for, are run by men. It is a male dominant society, so at what point do women have control over their bodies? Granted, Beyonce and Madonna do have the luxury of deciding how they want to use their bodies and what type of sex they want to sell, but at the end of the day, it is still creating this fantasy in the male mind that women are nothing more than sexual objects. On the other hand, the male fantasy is so broad that I could walk out of my house wearing sweat pants and someone could get aroused. There is no way to determine what sets off that sexual tick in a guy’s mind. Also, men may not even be thinking about the differences between Beyonce and a video ho that I have lain out. He most likely sees a practically naked woman on a TV and has the same reaction, no matter who the woman may be. A man may just see his desires being fulfilled and get the idea that whenever he wants to be satisfied, there will be a woman there to answer his every need.

Women have a responsibility to themselves and other women to look out for their image, bottom line. I may not know much else, but I know that so far. Women have got to stop allowing themselves to be duped into believing that using their bodies will help them get credibility because it will not. If a woman wants to be sexual because she wants to be, then by all means, do whatever feels natural. But do not consent to males getting to decide what counts as appropriate sexual behavior because that is just perpetuating the cycle of guyland, which is where we want to move away from.